I’ll start.
We had great chemistry but different goals. She was religious and looking to marry and thought she could change me, a non-religious person who intends to remain unmarried and childless. I was up front about the lack of religion and the lack of desire for marriage. She was not up front about her intent to change me.
After two months of regular flings she told me we couldn’t see each other anymore, because she wanted someone to go to church with, it was my fault she was living a sinful life (totally), and she was cheating on me with another dude was a Christian.
I’m kind of going through it right now, but I’m not sure.
I’ve been talking to this girl for a while, but we’ve been keeping things low-key.
The other day, work was crazy, I was tired, and I forgot to text her
She never texted me.
So I let it go another day, and she never texted me.
Now it’s today, and she still hasn’t texted me, which makes me feel like I was doing all the heavy lifting keeping the communication going.
We’re still relatively new in the relationship. I don’t feel like it’s a very high bar to expect that she would put effort in.
So I guess I’m deciding that if she doesn’t text me today then I’ll text her in the morning and say I hope she has a good one and move on.
Had that recently too. Was seeing this beautiful woman, and after our second date, we went from texting everyday, a lot, to her not texting me for 2 straight days, while I was texting her. It just felt off. I saw a random article about “breadcrumbing” where people, like, give just a little bit of themselves to keep you interested, while actually chasing someone they like better. They keep you on the bench as a backup to the person they actually want. I saw it as the universe giving me a sign. Told her “I dunno what changed, but I can take a hint. Good luck out there.”
This is not a great take. Someone often does the heavy lifting in conversations and not texting doesn’t mean not caring for a lot of people.
Something about the way that you have phrased your response is off-putting to me.
If you told me this in person, I would be angry at you.
It’s not like I’m trying to end a marriage or something. I’ve been talking to her for a few weeks. If cracks are forming this early, then it’s right for me to have my hackles up.
Yeah I can see why. My response wasn’t intended as directly as it is written and it is difficult to put into a short statement but let me try:
I see it often that a complete non-topic for one person is mis-interpreted as a lack of interest by another. Maybe some communication is missing.
My partner is very poor with texting/calling back. IN the beginning I used to interpret it, maybe as you have here, as a lack of interest. So, we spoke about it and it was made clear to me that this person just does not like using their phone as a main means of communication, and the interest was in-fact there.