I had a beagle growing up and I think she’s a large part of why I’m a cat person today. She would eat anything she could get her jaws on. Trash, toys, her own bodily waste, I do mean anything. Those anti-chewing bitterant sprays? She considered them a delicacy and ate through an entire stair corner we sprayed with it.

I lost count of how many beloved toys, Nintendo cartridges, and difficult to replace cables (back in the old days nothing was standardized) she chewed through, and no matter what type of trash can protector we used she’d still somehow manage to get inside to scatter that tasty, tasty garbage throughout the entire house.

She was a lovely and loving dog, but the constant messes and horrible smells she generated (a kitty litter box has nothing on beagle farts) form a core memory from my childhood.