There are no words in any language to sufficiently communicate how difficult it is.
It is post operative surgery waking up in agony levels of pain, every day, forever.
It breaks you mentally. It stunts your activity levels. It robs you of patience and kindness.
It is torture, performed by no one, where you would do anything to make it stop. Anything.
Being a compassionate, energy giving, productive, and present person in the lives of others whilst carrying the invisible caustic agony of chronic pain is a sysaphean task the is harder every degeneratively waking day.
Doing the right things (2 hours of PT and exercises every day, cognitive behavioral therapeutic techniques, biofeedback tools, purposefully doing what is painful to prevent classic conditioning avoidance, and no medication for pain) is so fucking hard. Every single day.
Did you try lsd/shrooms or mdma? If its psychologically induced they might help. Also there is a anti anxiety thing called Imidazenil with no known side effects or tolerance issues. Try them
I totally get what you’re saying. I’ve had the pleasure of having a intramedullary rod put in. I was mean to the nurse but it was wearing off from drugs, I always say fuck off to whoever wakes me up after surgery. Asked what’s your pain level out of 10… 14. I got to keep my leg, and the titanium finally fused with my bone so it’s not as bad as it was when I got it. A month after surgery, I almost threw up from the pain when a car door touched a screw. It’s a different kind of pain.
Everyone sees me as a normal person and gives me shit all the time. But the reality is, I’ve got like probably twenty concussions, broke a collar bone, my entire spine is fucked especially the lumbar section, had multiple rib fractures, broken tailbone, broken xiphoid (part of sternum), broke my nose a lot to the point where I only breathe out of one side, skull fractures, fractures from being punched and kicked in the face, and the list goes on. Everything I don’t do gets blamed on me drinking beer. Like I’ll give you a week in my body and then tell me what to do. Tylenol will kill your liver faster than alcohol and ibuprofen will make you shit blood eventually. Can’t get opiates anymore.
I’m just trying to say no one has a solution and everyone has a complaint. So I just stopped listening to everyone or answer them sarcastically. Why is diesel $10 a gallon? Oh it’s cause I drank beer last night.
I never contemplated this before last summer. I reconnected with an old acquaintance who has a spine issue and essentially lives in pain. He mentioned taking his own life jokingly maybe four or five times during the couple hours I spent at his place. His description of the pain and circumstances in which it can flare up shook me awake. He’s a good natured, very generous and composed man otherwise, and this is breaking him. All this to say I empathize as much as I can yet feel very powerless. Take care,
I’m really proud of you for being you and for fighting for today and tomorrow. I’m sorry for your pain. I don’t understand your struggles, I know what it’s like for a different reason to feel demotivated and tortured but you still treat everyone with compassion as much as you can. It’s so exhausting when there’s always something you have to worry about and it seems like it will never get better. I hope it isn’t like that forever.
I can’t imagine what that is like, but I am very grateful for you sharing. I have only ever had a couple of surgeries and knowing the pain would end was what I was grasping at the entire time.
I am wondering if I ever meet a person suffering with chronic pain, what can I do to help them?
Supporting them through their treatment is definitely a good idea. Being compassionate is a good idea on the surface, but I am not sure if I would be even capable of doing that when I have no idea what it is really like. Is it about understanding their suffering and accepting that their actions are effected by it?
When I try to think of things to say to them, I think of what I say to people who are suffering like “I hope you feel better.” and it just sounds insensitive.
One of the lessons from the chronic pain clinic at Mayo Hospital I learned was how to get friends and family to interact with you as a chronic pain sufferer.
A lot of what we were focusing on while in the chronic pain program was to prevent ourselves from classical conditioning ourselves with pain behaviors. Preventing that signaling can also be useful for friends and family. Paradoxically, the most empathetic thing you can do is to not acknowledge pain but to focus in on progress, process, and future plans.
You can both make it clear you wish to help, and that you don’t wish to treat them like the sum of their symptoms instead of a person.
It will vary in nuance for every person, which is why you sit down and talk to them about what is the best way ahownup for them. Unfortunately many patients have not had the 3 weeks of 8 hour days in the hospital getting the best possible cognitive behavioral therapy for chronic pain that I did, and what they ask for may be maladaptive.
It’s so difficult to be both your own advocate and temper natural desires with what NEEDS to be done. I would say almost impossible to navigate without professional help. If someone is going through that chronic pain, the best thing would be to gently guide them to professional resources for it. After that, the patient can more reliably give adaptive advocacy for themselves.
It is also bad if it’s just nagging pain. Even sciatica is not that bad most of the time but it just seems to never stop. It’s not something you can explain to someone. It’s like being married or having kids or losing someone close to you (etc etc): you might think you understand it, but you dont really get it until you live it.
That said, I changed my activities I do for fun and it did slow way down.
Chronic pain is so difficult.
There are no words in any language to sufficiently communicate how difficult it is.
It is post operative surgery waking up in agony levels of pain, every day, forever.
It breaks you mentally. It stunts your activity levels. It robs you of patience and kindness.
It is torture, performed by no one, where you would do anything to make it stop. Anything.
Being a compassionate, energy giving, productive, and present person in the lives of others whilst carrying the invisible caustic agony of chronic pain is a sysaphean task the is harder every degeneratively waking day.
Doing the right things (2 hours of PT and exercises every day, cognitive behavioral therapeutic techniques, biofeedback tools, purposefully doing what is painful to prevent classic conditioning avoidance, and no medication for pain) is so fucking hard. Every single day.
There is no vacation. There is no rest.
Did you try lsd/shrooms or mdma? If its psychologically induced they might help. Also there is a anti anxiety thing called Imidazenil with no known side effects or tolerance issues. Try them
I totally get what you’re saying. I’ve had the pleasure of having a intramedullary rod put in. I was mean to the nurse but it was wearing off from drugs, I always say fuck off to whoever wakes me up after surgery. Asked what’s your pain level out of 10… 14. I got to keep my leg, and the titanium finally fused with my bone so it’s not as bad as it was when I got it. A month after surgery, I almost threw up from the pain when a car door touched a screw. It’s a different kind of pain.
Everyone sees me as a normal person and gives me shit all the time. But the reality is, I’ve got like probably twenty concussions, broke a collar bone, my entire spine is fucked especially the lumbar section, had multiple rib fractures, broken tailbone, broken xiphoid (part of sternum), broke my nose a lot to the point where I only breathe out of one side, skull fractures, fractures from being punched and kicked in the face, and the list goes on. Everything I don’t do gets blamed on me drinking beer. Like I’ll give you a week in my body and then tell me what to do. Tylenol will kill your liver faster than alcohol and ibuprofen will make you shit blood eventually. Can’t get opiates anymore.
I’m just trying to say no one has a solution and everyone has a complaint. So I just stopped listening to everyone or answer them sarcastically. Why is diesel $10 a gallon? Oh it’s cause I drank beer last night.
I never contemplated this before last summer. I reconnected with an old acquaintance who has a spine issue and essentially lives in pain. He mentioned taking his own life jokingly maybe four or five times during the couple hours I spent at his place. His description of the pain and circumstances in which it can flare up shook me awake. He’s a good natured, very generous and composed man otherwise, and this is breaking him. All this to say I empathize as much as I can yet feel very powerless. Take care,
I’m really proud of you for being you and for fighting for today and tomorrow. I’m sorry for your pain. I don’t understand your struggles, I know what it’s like for a different reason to feel demotivated and tortured but you still treat everyone with compassion as much as you can. It’s so exhausting when there’s always something you have to worry about and it seems like it will never get better. I hope it isn’t like that forever.
I can’t imagine what that is like, but I am very grateful for you sharing. I have only ever had a couple of surgeries and knowing the pain would end was what I was grasping at the entire time.
I am wondering if I ever meet a person suffering with chronic pain, what can I do to help them? Supporting them through their treatment is definitely a good idea. Being compassionate is a good idea on the surface, but I am not sure if I would be even capable of doing that when I have no idea what it is really like. Is it about understanding their suffering and accepting that their actions are effected by it?
When I try to think of things to say to them, I think of what I say to people who are suffering like “I hope you feel better.” and it just sounds insensitive.
One of the lessons from the chronic pain clinic at Mayo Hospital I learned was how to get friends and family to interact with you as a chronic pain sufferer.
A lot of what we were focusing on while in the chronic pain program was to prevent ourselves from classical conditioning ourselves with pain behaviors. Preventing that signaling can also be useful for friends and family. Paradoxically, the most empathetic thing you can do is to not acknowledge pain but to focus in on progress, process, and future plans.
You can both make it clear you wish to help, and that you don’t wish to treat them like the sum of their symptoms instead of a person.
It will vary in nuance for every person, which is why you sit down and talk to them about what is the best way ahownup for them. Unfortunately many patients have not had the 3 weeks of 8 hour days in the hospital getting the best possible cognitive behavioral therapy for chronic pain that I did, and what they ask for may be maladaptive.
It’s so difficult to be both your own advocate and temper natural desires with what NEEDS to be done. I would say almost impossible to navigate without professional help. If someone is going through that chronic pain, the best thing would be to gently guide them to professional resources for it. After that, the patient can more reliably give adaptive advocacy for themselves.
I try to say things like, “I know I don’t understand your pain but I wish you peace and know that your efforts are not wasted.”
It is also bad if it’s just nagging pain. Even sciatica is not that bad most of the time but it just seems to never stop. It’s not something you can explain to someone. It’s like being married or having kids or losing someone close to you (etc etc): you might think you understand it, but you dont really get it until you live it.
That said, I changed my activities I do for fun and it did slow way down.